Saturday, 22 January 2011

To all the Ultramarines Fanboys...

If you got a haircut and it turned out looking terrible, would you go back for more?  Would you think,’He's a rubbish barber, I’ll go back so he can get some more practice?’.  If you went to a restaurant got terrible food, in small portions and they overcharged you, would you think ‘They must need my money to improve service so I’ll go again’? 

I hope the answer to all these questions is ‘No’.  If you get overcharged for poor service, you don’t go back for more and you certainly don’t go around shouting down anyone who says differently.  Which brings me onto the subject of the ‘Ultramarines’ movie, which is overpriced shit.  I think internet etiquette requires me to put ‘IMHO’ or something, but I’m going to go out on a limb here and state this as a fact, rather than an opinion.  It. Is. Overpriced. Shit.  Anyway, I’m not angry with the film or the various individuals involved, what I’m angry about is the chumps out there praising the film that they’ve just paid the best part of £30 to watch.

Don’t think that by buying it you’ll encourage GW to make ‘more and better’ films, you won’t.  I’m going to say this once more, then go off and kick the cat; IF YOU BUY A POOR QUALITY OVERPRICED PRODUCT, THE COMPANY WILL CONTINUE TO MAKE POOR QUALITY OVERPRICED PRODUCTS.

Thank you for your time.

10 comments:

Von said...

Keep fighting the good fight, dude. People who buy Ultramarines despite all that's been said against it are sending a very clear message, and it is this: "we will buy anything if it has Space Marines in it".

I'm not inclined to rag on the film for any poor quality in its effects; Codex Pictures is a fairly small operation and we shouldn't expect wonders out of them in that department.

I will happily rag on excellent and expensive voice actors phoning it in, a plot that seems to involve a great deal of wandering around a cheap-to-animate desert, a script that confirms every word spoken about the shallowness of the 40K setting, and plodding direction.

Not that I've actually seen it yet, mind, but I've been following the reviews with interest. Like most attempts by GW to branch out into another market, it seems to be one that fanboys will love and people with critical faculties will dismiss. I am both of these things, and therefore confused.

As a matter of interest, who did you watch it with and can they lend me their copy? If it's actually any good, I will happily eat the previous post and convert to the true faith on the spot.

Drathmere said...

Ultramarines was terrible. Given how rich the 40k universe is, it is an embarrassment that they even released a movie as bad as it.

The Antipope said...

There are people who actually liked the movie? Sorry, it's very hard to believe that...

pete the pagan-gerbil said...

I, too, know people who liked the film. I, too, didn't like it myself.

I can see the point of view of people who genuinely liked it (some things will be liked by a group of people, however ridiculous. See: X-Factor fans). I can also see the gambler's logic in that if the film flops, no more films will be made. Then we'll never see a good film. To prop up a bad film so that we may get a good film is better odds than not getting a good one, but it's an expensive gamble and not one I'd take.

If you're breaking into new ground, trying to make an impact and woo people, you either take your best shot or you trust to the blind faith of existing 'true believers'. If you really want to excel (see: Dawn of War games, when 40K games were never really blockbusters before) you've got to put something golden out there. I know Dawn of War players that have never even been in a Games Workshop store.

But yeah, Dave is right. This is a dud. Wake me up when there's something worth checking out.

pete the pagan-gerbil said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Frugal Dave said...

Thanks guys. Like I say the film itself doesn't upset me too much, it's the gambler's dilemma that pete describes. To continue his analogy, many people don't like x-factor, but they keep showing it on tv because people keep watching it! If nobody watched it, they'd stop showing it and put something better on.

Ah well...

grumhelden said...

The only explanation is that people are not seeing a naked Emperor. Well, the emperor is bloody naked, I posted on this a couple of weeks ago, but the gist was...if you make excuses for this shite, you deserve what you get.

Curis said...

I admire your analogy and cannot agree with it more. I'm amazed at the apologists out there, especially at a time when the internet is full of hate for things like the lovely new Stormraven.

Let market forces bear out. It's not as though people went out to buy the utterly appalling Squad Command just so they'd do another Dawn of War.

GDMNW said...

I think one of the big problems is that people are blaming Games Workshop. All they did was give Codex Pictures the go ahead.

Ultramarines: A Warhammer 40,000 movie is a Codex Pictures production. If you don't like it, give them the stick.

The IP remains a rich source for fiction and movies. All we need is the right company to go ahead an make a movie. Perhaps CP weren't that company.

Frugal Dave said...

@GDMNW, I agree that Codex must take a lot of the blame, but it was GW who employed them (rather than another film production company) and I'm pretty sure that GW must have had a big say in how it went. Perhaps a much bigger say than Codex might have wanted?